Sex

“Sex, like all things, is righteous to the extent that heaven meets earth there…

Sex is not, in its essence, about the body at all. It is an opportunity for us to remove our emotional armor with someone who wants us to remove it and who wants to remove his or her own. Problems occur when we have sex with people who have no desire whatsoever for us to be so naked in their presence, who have nosense of the sacred responsibility it is to hold another person’s heart in their hands….

There’s a state of being that is raw and authentic and fiercely graceful, like a great ballerina dancing in her prime. Sex in that place is more than just sex. With every couple who make it past the sad disconnection of sex that’s just sex to the fire at our center, the world is brought closer to the end of its pain. How excruciating to have touched that place, and then to land unsuspectingly back in the world as we knew it; the cold, non-intimate, un-soft world of people who cannot find each other. That’s why we never should have sex casually. If you’re not with a person who’s an artist at love, the art of love is a dangerous game….
So be careful but be brave…”

~Marianne Williamson, “Illuminata

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Welcome 2013!

What an incredible year 2012  has been for me. I did more in 2012 than in the last 3 years combined. My top 10 list of photo (1)experiences for 2012:

1. Moved out of my place with a roommate in University Heights to Bankers Hill was the best thing I could have done for myself. That was a toxic living situation and I am so much happier with my own space!!

2. Started P90X – I got the dvd set copied from a friend. I never knew the relief that a consistent exercise/nutrition plan could bring! I was delighted to find that my 3 PM munchies were staved off with a consistent eating schedule.All of that negative self talk about not having any willpower was unnecessary, my body was just hungry! I set my alarm to alert me to eat every 3 hours. 

I felt an elated sense of mastery and efficacy. I lost 15 pounds and gained muscle mass. I loved every moment running to Balboa Park.

3. Got involved in the San Diego Entrepreneur community. Attended Start-Up America San Diego and helped to produce SD Entrepreneur Day. Helped at SD Quick Pitch

4. Helped to organized TEDxAFC event

5. Teen girls mentor for Jenna Druck center

6. Unstoppable Entrepreneur event

7. Attended Women’s Institute of Negotiation ‘Boot Camp’ 

8. Created my site ‘Bridge to Bohemia’

9. Started being more visible

10. Was a juror on a 4 month trial. Was a very intense experience. 

Servant Leadership

“Vulnerability is based on mutuality and requires boundaries and trust. It’s not oversharing, it’s not purging, it’s not indiscriminate disclosure.  Vulnerability is about sharing our feelings and our experiences with people who have earned the right to hear them.”

Leadership is about empowering others. When the best leader’s work is done, people will say: we did it ourselves. (Lao Tzu)

Your greatest success comes when others around you benefit so much from your presence that they not only succeed beyond where you are, but may not even realize the role you played in their success — nor do you tell them.

 In developing the skills of servant leadership I constantly keep people in mind and pass on opportunities or ideas that can help them, I practice authenticity, I tell people the truth even if it is hard for them to hear and focus on allowing relationships to change form if that is what needs to happen while keeping in mind that the most important factor is that I am a positive influence in that person’s life. Recently I’ve run into a roadblock, I’m feeling too porous – giving too much.

Now I understand I need to be more discerning who I open myself to.

To be human is to make meaning out of meaninglessness

ImageThe only real choice we have is the meaning we give events in our lives

I wrote earlier:

1. Powerlessness is the worst feeling someone can feel

I can now with a little bit of confidence add the following 2 as the other painful feelings in life.

2. The inability to realize that it is we who decide the meaning of things that happen to us

3. Inability to decide a “constructive” (life giving) meaning after tragedy because it conflicts with our preexisting world view.

I spoke with the mother of one of the victims after the trial and truly the most painful thing was, not the grief and loss but the ongoing meaninglessness of it all. The  literal fabric of her life shaken so drastically to pieces… it takes strength to live with contradiction and then even more strength to become congruent. Up through the fertile stench of society… Life… finds a way.