A common complaint of men is that women lead them on. It’s painful when men don’t want to be friends with us because we don’t want anything sexual/physical with them; this has contributed to the difficulty in speaking our truth. My most cherished male relationships right now are those with emotional intimacy without ANY fear of advances. Those men are my heroes. I am a strong woman – if I want a physically intimate relationship, you will know it. When I sense that a man wants physical intimacy without first wanting to know and “undress” my mind and heart I close off and my defenses go up. It makes it difficult to admit the truth/be authentic in a LOVING WAY when in defense mode and this blocks women from telling the truth because in feeling our boundaries pushed we have to go into “bitch” mode to be taken seriously, be heard, and re-establish our boundaries. Some of us don’t want to “go there” to speak our truth, because this also feels inauthentic because it’s reactive. We want to tell you with kindness what we want and don’t want. And fellas … we KNOW and SENSE when you want a physical relationship even if you say you don’t -it oozes out of you. Men don’t trust women to tell the truth – this is part of the old paradigm of “the chase” – where her saying ‘no’ actually means ‘yes.’ There is mutual responsibility here. Thank you to the men that value a woman’s honesty and authenticity more than her sexuality – you are changing our world. ♥

Advertisements